Sunday, 16 July 2017

Dear medicine man,
I need your help.
My husband always comes home in
the middle of the night.
He always ignores meals that I took
hours to prepare...
When I ask him where he was,
He usually looks at me with eyes
that want to start a silly war.
I suspect that my husband is
cheating on me with a silly whore.

Dear medicine man!
Anytime when I'm not near,
And my husband attempts to cheat on me,
I want you to totally make his
manhood disappear.
If the tongue of a snail and the penis
of an ant is what you want,
I will bring them.

Dear medicine man,
I want you to make my husband pay
for the remaining part of my dowry.
And if possible,
I want you to shrink the breasts and
buttocks of any woman who will
attempt to spend my husband's salary.
If you want me to make love to a dead man,
Or bring you my husband's
underwears.... I will do it.

Dear medicine man.
I have spent days and nights chewing lemons and smearing avocados 
on my face just to look young 
for my husband.
I want you to make him eat my food
and wipe my plate with his tongue.
If kissing a mad man or bringing you
the teeth of a house fly is what it will
take.... So be it.
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